I think I feel my McLunch coming up


As seen on www.epinions.com
How many is too many? I asked my self that when considering writing another bad review for McDonalds. The answer I came up with is that there can never be too many, because McDonalds is such a disgusting entity. It's not just a disgusting place to eat, it's a disgusting place to work, and on top of that it's advertising practices are disgusting.

If you want to get fat and feel nauseous, this is the place for you. The gazillions of people who eat this slop everyday must not bother to look at what they are shoving down their pie-hole. The hamburgers are flat and always look smashed, and the "beef" inside always seems to have been salvaged from a cow that was mutilated by aliens. Every time I have eaten one of these Ebola-burgers I found myself wishing I were dead afterward, and don't tell me you've never got diarrhea from a Big Mac.

On the occasion that I am able to get past the revolting food, I am then confronted by the guilt I feel for the people serving this troll-gruel. I've seen those commercials where the McDonalds employee loves their life so much, and they always look clean, and they are always smiling as if their life was actually going somewhere. The real employees rarely if ever look this happy. To me the look on their face usually says, "Help me, please God help me! I feel like my body is still alive, but I am surely dead, for this could only be hell! Please God no more torment, let me die now! Please let me slip on the 3 inch thick layer of floor grease and fall face first into the french-fry bin to be horridly burned so I can be rushed to the hospital in agonizing pain only to be stuck in a traffic jam for 4 hours after the ambulance has run out of anesthetic and then finally killed by lightning right before I am rushed through the ER doors! For then at least I would be dead, and that would be better than this torment!"

As if all that weren't enough, McDonalds also brainwashes children. They market more heavily to children than any other group, because when a kid grows up eating fast food smut, they are highly likely to eat it for their whole life. Why else do you think they always have a new toy in the happy meal? Why else do they all have those gigantic gerbil-farm looking playground things?

So go ahead. Give into all the marketing. Give in to the so-called "convenience", and ignore the fact that you weigh 600 lbs, and your 7-year-old child needs a walker to support his short morbidly obese lard riddled frame. Go ahead see if I care.